The Wasperly Arts

Golfing 2
(as in, the Sisterly Arts)

I decided not to drive down to Monarch Butterfly Heaven this weekend- Pacific Grove, CA, Butterfly Town!- because going there and not being able to enjoy the wasperly arts, tennis & golf, high tea, walks along the sea, would be some form of odd torture. Instead I sit in this wintry hell working on old computer projects that haven’t gotten done.

I have a short week and some before a business trip, and need to rehab my sorely battered constitution. I need to shop. I need to do things like the dishes, and pay bills, and unmire myself from the dozens of projects I’ve let languish while I slept recovering from Evil Cold.

But I really want to play golf! It’s painful listening to the PGA news (and I know why Singh is no Tiger Woods. He’s 1) not hot 2) an asshole)! And I want to play tennis! Because I just bought my niece this ADORABLE all pink tennis kit. Pink wrist bands, big ole pink Nike bag, a ridiculously cute 10-year-old sized racket, and some tennis balls- not pink because I don’t want her ridiculed. Not that the rest of the pink is going to save her, haha.

God, I would have loved one when I was 10. Something about tennis technology really zoomed into the orbit in the 90s, and everyone got an oversized racket that made that delightful “thwunk” despite how badly you hit the ball. Back in my day… we had plywood rackets that would make your entire arm shake in this horrible funny-bone way if you hit the ball wrong. And yet we played, on and on. Mostly I remember going to the lit courts at Memorial Park on Stevens Creek with Sally-my-friend (not to be confused with Sally-my-sister), and we would play horribly for hours. I don’t know how these sports-dates got setup. I mean, who made the suggestion? Seems like a very smart and intelligent activity for pre-teens, but we rarely did smart things.

Now I go to DiMaggio court where they have a lovely painted line on the wall telling you where the net should be. I haven’t gone a lot- usually get tired after 20 minutes or so. I’ve heard if you stay a bit someone will let you play pick-up.

Golf in the city? By far, the 9-hole at Golden Gate Park wins for cheapness- the twilight tee-off and a city resident pass will make it about $9, and then Lincoln Park, but I havent’ played there because I’m all talk. Despite actually having the clubs in the trunk of the car, which we all know is the first step to addiction.

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